Aaaaaand we’re back!

It’s Friday afternoon so you just know we’ve got another fresh installment of the NADDPOD Listen Along.

This episode sees our heroes working their way through the cold and unforgiving mountain passes on their way to the Temple of the Guardians.

Check these out:

• NADDPOD Listen Along: Eldermourne Episode 15, Portrait of a Blade
• NADDPOD Listen Along: Eldermourne Episode 16, Curses & Cliffhangers
• NADDPOD Listen Along: Introduction

We last left off with Bukvar being attacked by one of those titular Monsters of the Mountain, so let’s jump right into it to make sure that everyone’s favorite cowardly book is alright!

Recap

Bukvar, on his scouting mission up the mountain, is attacked by a giant, venomous spider.

Fia, Spritle, Zirk, and Henry (who summons Shank to close the distance, seeing as he’s moving at half-speed due to two levels of exhaustion) run over to help the book.

The party exchange blows with the spider for a few rounds, but finally bring it down in a burst of flame from Bukvar.

Some of the spider’s venom oozes into the sleeping trench, giving Fia and Bukvar an excuse to joyfully dig another one.

Everyone gets a good night’s sleep.

Henry makes himself some cutoff pants in the morning, and immediately has Fia mend them because it is cold. 

Zirk makes some ammo for the gun he found with his mom’s initial on it. Zirk considers giving the gun to Spritle:

“Please don’t give me a gun, papa.”

“That was a test, and you passed it.”

There are 25 more miles to go before reaching the temple. Caldwell rolls a 2 immediately, meaning that the party comes up against another rock wall. They decide to save their resources and just try to climb the wall normally.

They take some damage, but eventually manage to make it to the top.

Jake rolls a 9, resulting in an easy 5 miles. Emily rolls a 15. Caldwell passes his roll. Jake rolls another 9.

The party has now made it 45 total miles, and exhaustion sets in, forcing CON saves at the end of each mile.

Henry and Zirk both take a level of exhaustion at mile 48. They all pass at mile 49. Everyone passes on the final mile (though Zirk just barely makes it thanks to a Bless from Fia).

The party is at the base of a massive cliff that they need to climb to get to the temple. Given the levels of exhaustion, the Third Mates decide to camp at the bottom of the cliff and will try to scale it the following day.

Fia reads up on abominable yetis and finds that they are scared of fire, so she sets up a perimeter of torches around their camp. Zirk sets up some snares.

Fia wrangles Phillip and manages to learn the spell Shatter. Zirk and Fia try to discern the Fairy that cursed Henry, rolling a 23 (thanks to a Chronal Shift) determining that it is not an Autumn Fairy.

Henry realizes that the stuff with his shadow acting up didn’t start happening until after Kane tried to rip it away, and figures that his shadow abilities are not linked to his curse.

Fia, doing more research in the book, finds that Spring has a birth element to it, which makes sense given Henry’s constant rebirth.

During the night, the party hears the abominable yeti roaring from far away. It does not manage to find them in the night.

The party takes on the cliffside in the morning. Henry spots the nest of another giant spider further up the cliff. Bukvar does not see the spider, but he does fly past a cyclops at the top of the mountain.

The cyclops spots the Third Mates making their way up the mountainside.

“No more people! no more!” it yells, throwing a boulder at Henry. “Eat boulder, fuckhead!”

“Ah, don’t worry, if this kills me I just get to come out and do it all over again,” says Henry as the boulder hits him.

“Just that perfect brand of Henry optimism I’ve come to love,” notes Zirk.

“We will find you as a baby, Mr. Henry,” Fia promises, “We will find you.”

“Just look for the ugliest kid at the nursery.”

Henry manages to hold on thanks to a Chronal Shift from Fia (now flavored as a “Time Devil”). She also heals him up with a Healing Word.

Zirk casts Sanctuary on Henry as well. Henry rolls a nat 1 for the climb, but Fia Chronal Shifts again turning it into a 22.

Zirk gets hit by the next rock, which knocks him out. Henry manages to hold his unconscious body up with the ropes. Fia heals Zirk.

Henry manages to reach the top of the cliff, where the cyclops is waiting. The monster throws another rock at Fia, who Shields against the attack.

Fia gets a nat 1 and falls off the cliff, but Zirk holds her steady. Henry and Shank try to wrestle the cyclops, attempting to throw him off the edge of the mountain. The cyclops also tries to throw Henry off the edge as well. Both attempts fail, but the cyclops manages to knock Henry out by punching him.

Bukvar is sent to the top of the cliff to breath fire on the cyclops. Spritle is also sent up there to bring Henry a healing potion, which brings him back to life.

Henry tries to push the cyclops off the cliff again. He wins two athletics contests in a row, managing to send the monster off the mountain.

Jake asks Murph if he can try to aim the cyclops at the giant spider, and Murph pulls the classic DM move of saying that if he rolls a nat 20, then sure.

So, of course, Jake rolls a nat 20, causing the cyclops to grab the spider as it falls, both splattering on the rocks below.

Fia and Zirk make it to the top of the mountain. All three party members are pretty hurt from the climb.

Henry hears the sounds of several people shouting orders at each other. Bukvar heads in to check out what’s going on, seeing statues of great fairies carved into stones around the temple. Outside the entrance he sees a camp with armed bandits. They spot Bukvar and shoot at him with a musket, but miss.

“Bukvar flaps back, flies amongst the trees, loses the bird’s eye view as the bandits take off into the forest after him. You hear the loud bands of guns as Bukvar attempts to fly back to you… And that’s where we’ll end our session.”

Commentary

Let’s just say that this episode truly lived up to its name.

And while the party didn’t have to face that abominable yeti (that is, they haven’t had to face it yet…i), there was still a few formidable foes to take on as they traversed the last few miles of the trek to the temple.

As I’ve noted before, combat has a nasty habit of getting boring in D&D. It makes sense, seeing how six seconds of in-game time gets slowed down to 15-30 minutes per round (when you don’t have Murph’s editing abilities, that is), and usually consists of players doing their most optimized attack to deal the most amount of damage every single round.

Well, it seems that one way of spicing up combat is by dangling your PCs on the side of a cliff.

I loved that Murph brought back fan-favorite Pendergreen’s voice for the cyclops, and that he actually had some character rather than just being a voiceless monster like the giant spider.

Backtracking a little bit, I was also excited to see the Mates dialing it in on determining the Fairy that caused Henry’s curse. Perhaps we’ll be able to learn a bit more from the fairy statues outside the temple, as well.

Giving the players something to do during downtime (investigating the curse, creating ammo, learning new spells) is something somewhat new to NADDPOD, as I don’t think that the Band of Boobs had any in-game mechanics that they used during their off-time… other than their usual hilarious banter, of course.

It’s good to give your players something their character can do when they’ve got a spare moment, though, because most D&D parties will not be populated by professionally funny people.

As my thorn from the last Listen Along was that the party has yet to come upon a living bandit that they can get some answers from, I’m excited to see how the start of the next session plays out.

The Third Mates may be in for some trouble with this group, though, given that they got pretty banged up from that cyclops and the side of the cliff.

Perhaps Zirk’s mom is there with them? Maybe diplomacy will be the way to go on this one? Who knows!

That could actually lead to some interesting situations, if the Third Mates convince the bandits to let them join their group in tracking down Batilda.

I guess we’ll just have to wait until next episode to find out.

Roses:

• Fia’s love of frozen hotdogs
• Pendergreen’s being back (in voice and in spirit)
• Henry tossing the cyclops off the cliff and rolling a nat 20 for it to hit the spider on its way down
• Fia spamming Chronal Shift to keep Henry going
• Zirk channeling some Old Cob energy by wanting to put random stuff in his gun

Thorns:

• The fact that we have to wait two weeks until next episode!

Buds:

• Finding out everything these bandits know about Zirk’s mom
• THE TEMPLE

That’s it for this episode! Find other NADDPOD Listen Alongs here and share your takes, predictions, roses, and thorns in the comments below.

Eldermourne Episode 16, Curses & Cliffhangers